Trouble In Xanth - Chapter 6: Sinking

[Arch Lich Burns]

"Bill, you can make food grow right? If we can make thier food larger, they won't starve."

[WearsHats]

Hmm, yes. I could enlarge their food stores. Depending on what kind of food it was. And how they felt about eating, say, an apple the size of a house. I'm not sure how it would work with something like grain.

[Theonewhoisodd]

Hmm, yes. I could enlarge their food stores. Depending on what kind of food it was. And how they felt about eating, say, an apple the size of a house. I'm not sure how it would work with something like grain.

OOC: Not very well.

[Synch]

"Vote stay more, help the poor."

[Dlover]

"... I suppose we can spare some time. But not too much."

[Theonewhoisodd]

The man begins to look hopeful as two members have voted yes.

[Synch]

► Show Spoiler

The man begins to look hopeful as two members have voted yes.

Three votes: Duncan, Tenel and Synge. And Bill abstains.

[GathersIngredients]

"Well, I guess if it doesn't take too long, we can try to help them.
Can I get an answer to my questions from before? Why only right bear arms? Where and how did you get them in the first place? Do you have any left bear arms left over which you could use instead and just pretend they are right ones? Most people might not even notice the difference.
Also, did you provoke the baboons or can you think of any other reason why they took the right bear arms away?

On the food situation: Maybe we could grind the grain into flour first and enlarge that, afterwards?"

[Quarg]

Jas laughs, 'A giant grain of flour is likely as useless as a giant grain of wheat. But I do want our questions answered sir, or I will vote NO!"

[Arch Lich Burns]

"We can make giant bread. Or giant chickens that produce giant eggs."

[WearsHats]

I must admit, a festival centered around trophy bear limbs strikes me as rather grizzly. And having to depend on it to put all your books in the black, with even that barely getting you by without bare cupboards seems like an unbearable economic policy. Perhaps you should consider trying the polar opposite.

You can make the festival free and work on producing trade goods the rest of the year. Instead of bringing people in, send your goods out. As for the festival itself, you could cut off your sleeves and celebrate your right to bare arms. Meantime, I can increase the size of your breads, meat, fruit, and suchlike so you won't starve.

As far as I can tell, no one's life is in danger here, and lives do depend on us completing our quest in time.

[Dlover]

"I think giant chickens would probably start to eat people by accident. Not the best idea."

[Synch]

Synge stomps his feet impatiently.

"Little man, help with plan! Give replies or us give goodbyes!"

[Theonewhoisodd]

"Well, I guess if it doesn't take too long, we can try to help them.
Can I get an answer to my questions from before? Why only right bear arms? Where and how did you get them in the first place? Do you have any left bear arms left over which you could use instead and just pretend they are right one? Most people might not even notice the difference.
Also, did you provoke the baboons or can you think of any other reason why they took the right bear arms away?

On the food situation: Maybe we could grind the grain into flour first and enlarge that, afterwards?"

"The right arms are traditional and unfortunately our people don't know where to get the left arms. We get them off of arm chairs which freely give them up to us every season. As for the baboons we have a couple trouble makers in town who irritated them earlier. A couple of kids with annoying talents."

[Arch Lich Burns]

"Would that not be the right to chair arms? Why not use the right to chair legs then?"

► Show Spoiler

I like how this got from wordplay and jokes to something our characters discuss seriously and trying to fix with said wordplay

[Theonewhoisodd]

"The arm chairs only bear right bear arms."

[Dlover]

"I... honestly don't know what to say. If those kids caused the problem, make them fix it.

[WearsHats]

► Show Spoiler

I like how this got from wordplay and jokes to something our characters discuss seriously and trying to fix with said wordplay

I would, too, if it was working. Bad enough we got into politics; I don't think I would have enjoyed that even if I agreed with the GM's stance. But our attempts to deal with the situation in game at face value have been ignored to a frustrating degree. And I'm pretty sure I don't even want to know about those annoying kids.

[Arch Lich Burns]

"Then how did you get the right to bear right arm chair arms?"

[WearsHats]

We've offered what help we can. You don't seem interested. All you want is for us, a group of complete strangers, to drop our urgent quest for the fate of the entire kingdom and spend an unknown amount of time tracking down a group of apes of unknown numbers and fighting them for you, all so you can salvage what seems to be a bad economic policy for another year, for little to no benefit to us or our quest. Were I at my leisure, wandering the land for my own pleasure and experience (as I had been for some time before this quest), I'd consider it. But, as things are, I'm inclined to vote no. I sympathize with your plight, but lives depend on our haste. Perhaps you can coax the chairs to produce more arms for you. I don't know what more to suggest. If we leave, you are no worse off than when we came. You could have had a giant chicken (which seems a worthy festival attraction), but if you're not interested, we'll just be on our way.

[Quarg]

Jas shrugs "Likely you need to talk to the Baboons and punish the kids for whatever they did and they will return their arms..."

[GathersIngredients]

Thunderhoof scratches his head again, a little annoyed at how only ONE person of the whole village is willing to talk to them to ask their help in the first place, and even he seems to make it necessary for the companions to worm every last bit of useful information out of him.
"Well, if some kids from your village did something to offend the baboons and that's the reason they took your right bear arms away, I suggest you send the offenders and/or a delegation of well spoken people to the baboons and try to make amends with them. Apologize, offer retribution for whatever damage your kids did and maybe they will give you the right bear arms back in time for your festival.
You seem really insistent on getting them back as the only acceptable solution, but at the same time you seem to be unwilling to do anything to handle the matter yourself. In any case I fail to see what you need us for. The ideas we came up with and the talents we have to offer obviously didn't tickle your fancy. If you can be that picky, you can't be that badly off. On the other hand, the king, who asked for our help first, is dying." Thunderhoof remarks, shrugs, and - if the others don't insist on staying - prepares to follow Tenel's lead again.

[Arch Lich Burns]

"Why must you focus on bear arms? You can survive without relying on them."

[Synch]

The clever vernacular is well above Synge's intellect, he loses track of the conversation and starts watching a squirrel.

[Jacon]

" Hrmmm....I'm changing my vote. My companions are right. We have important business and if your so stuck with tradition that you won't accept the alternatives we're offering than we can't help you. make amends to these baboons and deal with your own problems. Perhaps when I return after this quest I can help you for a price.