[18 October 2021] - Heart to Heart

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Krulle
Transcribes Goblins
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Re: [18 October 2021] - Heart to Heart

Post by Krulle » Tue Nov 02, 2021 1:18 am

I agree with Minmax's reason for apologising likely being more selfish, then the desire to soothe the pain he inflicted.

But he did, and he did continuously, thereby acknowledging how grave his error was.

But still, I find the panels as they are okay.
He saw something he could make her stop and listen, because any leash will stop the leash-wearer from running away if you yank on it.
So he grabbed and yanked her to a stop.
And her face reaction told him to think about what this leash is besides a physical leash.
And he recognised his fault quickly, and recoiled from the idea of having used the leash's magic against her.

(I still wait for the moment where "Take the leash" will make a difference for her)
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Velgar
Speaks Quietly
Posts: 126

Re: [18 October 2021] - Heart to Heart

Post by Velgar » Tue Nov 02, 2021 7:02 am

Krulle wrote: Tue Nov 02, 2021 1:18 am I agree with Minmax's reason for apologising likely being more selfish, then the desire to soothe the pain he inflicted.

But he did, and he did continuously, thereby acknowledging how grave his error was.

But still, I find the panels as they are okay.
He saw something he could make her stop and listen, because any leash will stop the leash-wearer from running away if you yank on it.
So he grabbed and yanked her to a stop.
And her face reaction told him to think about what this leash is besides a physical leash.
And he recognised his fault quickly, and recoiled from the idea of having used the leash's magic against her.

(I still wait for the moment where "Take the leash" will make a difference for her)
All of this up there. 👍
~The smallest of pebbles can start an avalanche, but even the greatest of boulders can hit nothing.~

cbertrand
Mutters to Themself
Posts: 32

Re: [18 October 2021] - Heart to Heart

Post by cbertrand » Tue Nov 16, 2021 9:36 am

I think I finally have the modifications to hold in my head to get past this.

1) Swap the head shots and dialogue in those two panels.

2) Change Kin’s explanation to have a bit more condemnation (“selfish” is not strong enough, imho) and have her directly refer to “seeing” him as an explanation for how she knows how much he was giving by drinking the tea. A la:

“What you did was inexcusable, but I can _see_ you. I know you were apologizing, not just to get my forgiveness but also to ease my pain. I know how much it broke you to drink that tea. I know you were doing it because I asked; you were giving me back control. And I can _see_ that that one mistake is not who you truly are.”

(if Kin mentions “seeing” Minmax, canonically, and he acts surprised, I’ll just write it off as Minmax not being very bright)

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